Over the last several years, I have prayed for many things: patience, strength, guidance, healing and safety of others. I prayed for my sons to find their way to Him and for my husband and me to be able to guide them. At my lowest points, I would be sitting in my car or on my back porch with tears pouring out while I talked to God asking him why. After each prayer, I did not hear God answer; however, I always felt more at peace and better prepared to face what was to come. I no longer felt the need to ask why because the “why” no longer mattered.
Looking back over my life now, I realize that God was a constant presence who protected and guided me. Yes, I faced many hardships, but God gave me the strength to battle through them. Many times, I made choices that led me away from Him, but God continuously placed people in my path who reminded me to look to Him for all my needs. Sometimes I listened. Sometimes I did not. But, God did not give up on me.
Many people have prayed for me and my family, and I believe those prayers have been a large part of us being able to keep going. Many have prayed for a miracle in my life, and I believe God has answered. I cannot move, but I can travel. My lungs do not work on their own, but I can breathe. I cannot eat or drink, but my stomach is full. I cannot speak, but I have found my new voice. Each day I am here is a miracle.
Since I was diagnosed with ALS, I have turned to Him more and more to help me face each day and to give me strength for my family. I pray silently now, but the sense of calm still fills me when I am done. My ability to continue on is fortified. Tough days have not gone away but going to church this past Sunday reminded me I have what I need to make it through them. . . my family, my friends, and my God. We may have not heard Him, but God has answered our prayers.